First and foremost, I like being naked. I have since I was a kid. I used to streak naked through the house all the time. Funny how some things never change. But I have noticed as some women age they seem to pile on more and more clothing (although a lot of it never matches). Sweats, ill-fitting T-shirts, and flip-flops seem to be the wardrobe for so many moms that I see at school, birthday parties or the grocery store. And don’t forget the slippers and rarely washed hair. Ladies! Just because you’re a mom now doesn’t mean you don’t have to bathe or dress yourself. And whatever you do…no flannel!!
So what do I like better than being naked? Well, nothing. But second to that I like being dressed like one hot mother phucker. Looking back on older photos of myself I realize that I didn’t always have such an acute fashion sense. In fact, it’s quite embarrassing. I think I’ll just blame it on the style of the decade. Whatever it was, I’ve learned a lot since.
First and foremost, when you leave the house remember that you never know whom you will run into. Odds are if you look like shit you will run into the one person you do not want to see. It’s a given. Moms don’t always have time to spend hours getting ready to a run to the grocery store, but a quick shower and basic, nice-looking and well-fitting clothes can turn you from a disaster into head-turning MILF.
The person who has taught me the most about basic fashion is Stacy London from TLC’s What Not To Wear. I love her directness and sense of humor. Her book Dress Your Best is a must have. The first thing she has you do is determine your body shape… your body shape NOW, not 10 pounds from now, but NOW. If you have goals that’s wonderful. I have blogged about weight loss and eating right and applaud you if that is your path right now. But great tailors exist in this world and they are there to be used. To determine your current body shape Stacy gives this advice in her book:
This is not rocket science. You don’t even need a tape measure. Just stand in front of a full-length mirror in your underwear, scary as that may sound, and take a look at yourself. (Stacy had Jack Daniels on the rocks and Clinton had a Tanqueray and tonic before attempting this exercise. Worked like a charm!)
Ah! A woman after my own heart. Of course, I had a Vodka first. She also gives some GREAT advice about those sweats:
Walking around in oversized sweats makes you look like you’ve given up. And you may start to internalize that feeling. So, this is one time in life when a quick fix can actually have long-term effects.
I really like this book because it takes pretty much each and every body type (men & women) and gives you work, weekend, and evening wardrobe essentials. I say “essentials” because it is all about quality over quantity. A few good pieces can mix and match very easily. And one of the best tips they give is how to pick out a pair of jeans; there really is an art involved in finding just the right jean for a woman. Be prepared to try on about 10-20 pair and take a friend, a true friend, who will be honest about how they look on you. Here’s their book:
One other item I recommend is the DVD set “What Not to Wear: Mom Makeovers.”
What Not To Wear is a great show all the way around for great makeover tips (clothes, hair, make-up); add it to your DVR lineup if you’ve never watched it. Stacy and her co-host Clinton give very direct advice without ever asking for someone to change their body. I like that.
Being sexy is about empowerment and having power over your own body; the body you have here and now. You have to own your sexuality, feel it, flaunt it, whore it out in the bedroom. What are you waiting for? The first head you turn will make your day.
Still Rockin’ It.