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My adorable sister called me yesterday, Mother’s Day, on a break to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day. Something she never forgets to do no matter what. I asked her about her day and she proceeded to tell me how badly it sucked.

“It’s amateur day,” she said.

My sister is head-wait at one of the nicer restaurants in Austin, something I very much admire her for. I know that sometimes she thinks I look down on her for this chosen career path but she is sadly mistaken. I know that she works her ass off and is highly respected in her chosen profession. This princess (me) could never do her job. Ever. First and foremost, I’m too much of a princess. A title that is both self-given and handed down to me in many-a-condescending and frustrating moments from my ex-husband and ex-boyfriends. Secondly, I just don’t want to work that fucking hard. I like my cush sales job that lets me work flex hours and pays me vacation and sick days. What happened when my sister got sick last year and was out for two weeks? She didn’t make one damn dime. That really sucks. Nope, I couldn’t do that job in a million years.

Ang, I admire the hell out of you for how hard you work and how you have worked and clawed your way to the top. Top that off with the fact that people adore you…you pretty much rock!!

What pissed me off yesterday is that it truly is amateur diner day because people don’t realize how busy these servers are from the time they hit the floor until the time they go home. Leaving a 10% or even 15% tip is un-fucking-acceptable. You should always tip your server 20%. If you can’t afford that then you should be eating somewhere cheaper so you can tack on that extra 20%. Do you know how much these people make (or do not make) per hour? Do you know how hard they work? Do you know how much crap they take from people like you?

This public service announcement is brought to you by Scarlet Mom.

Still Rockin’ It
ScarletMom

PS Even my little guy, who is 7, knew to tip 20% yesterday at brunch. If you don’t know this, maybe we can arrange a meeting and he can educate you.

Yesterday while perusing Facebook I saw the following post:

Barbara Streisand turns 70 today and her nose is still enormous. Seriously, you could clear a table with that thing.

After a couple of exchanges this person said he was just joking but I didn’t find it funny. I asked this person to look at himself in the mirror and examine his own imperfections. “Are you so impeccably perfect?” I asked him.

I believe this type of behavior is what made it and makes it so damn difficult to be a child. Big noses, thick glasses, a handicap, being overweight, pimples…all these things are prime targets for bullies to poke fun at and make a child’s life miserable. If you are not drop-dead gorgeous then you will be made fun of relentlessly. I know I was. Until high school, I was awkward and overweight. No one wanted to be my friend and the boys were merciless. Of course, when I blossomed in high school they wouldn’t leave me alone. The same thing goes for the geeks. They were awkward and socially inept. But give people time and see what they become. Who are a couple of the most famous and wealthy geeks you can think of? Oh yes, Bill Gates and the late Steve Jobs. And the jocks that teased them to no end (at least in my school)? A few that I know of are washed up pathetic losers. Take that you cowardly bullies. The lesson here is to never judge or label. Those growing up years are difficult and our bodies and minds are forming; give these kids a break.

And Barbara Streisand? Hell, I’ll take her nose any day to have that amazing voice. If you can’t see past her nose then you need to take a step back and reexamine your own damn self.

As adults, it’s our job to model good behavior for our children and show them non-bullying behavior. In the business world, “The Fish Rots From the Head Down” is something I hear a lot and it’s very true. The biggest bullies in school usually have asshole parents and bully fathers.

The website medicinenet.com has some good tips on how to teach your kids about bullying and also how to deal with bullying if it becomes an issue in your home:

Preventing bullying must start at home, so parents must set a good example and discourage the practice whenever possible.

The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests how to discuss bullying with your child:

Explain that bullying is never acceptable.
Set rules around any aggressive behavior, making sure to be firm and consistent in enforcing them.
Lead by example; show your child that you don’t need to threaten or embarrass others to get what you want.
Discipline in a non-physical way, such as by taking away privileges.
If your child has a history of bullying, work with school faculty to develop an appropriate solution.

I hope that you will model this good behavior in your home. Do you remember what it was like to be an awkward adolescent? It really sucked, didn’t it? Let’s help make things better for our own kids.

Still Rockin’ It
Scarlet Mom