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Women Over 40…And How Awesome We Are

By Scarlet Mom | November 14, 2011 | Being a Mom IS Sexy, Just For Fun, Style | Comments Off

Yes, we are awesome and it took a great essayist like Andy Rooney to recognize us. In his essay Andy Rooney on Women Over Forty, Andy spells it out like no one else can. If any of you haven’t taken the time to notice just how incredibly amazing we are, then you are missing out. Big time.

Andy Rooney says:

As I grow in age, I value women who are over forty most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over forty will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, “What are you thinking?” She doesn’t care what you think.

If a woman over forty doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it’s usually something more interesting.

A woman over forty knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of forty give a hoot what you might think about her or what she’s doing.

Women over forty are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated.

A woman over forty has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn’t trust the guy with other women. Women over forty couldn’t care less if you’re attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won’t betray her.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over forty. They always know.

A woman over forty looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over forty is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one! You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over forty for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of forty-plus, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some twenty-two-year-old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free,” here’s an update for you. Now 80 percent of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.

Still Rockin’ It…even more since I turned 40.
Scarlet Mom

Making Peace With Your Body

By Scarlet Mom | July 11, 2011 | Self Improvement, Style | Comments Off

Are you at peace with your own body? Not many people are, especially women. Most of us wish we were a few sizes smaller, in better shape, had bigger boobs, a smaller ass, better muscle definition…the list could go on forever. When you dress yourself or shop for clothes, are you at peace with yourself then? You would be surprised at how good you can look if you would allow yourself to come to terms with your body and accept yourself as you are.

The average woman in the US right now is a size 14 and weights around 160 pounds. Yet the fashion industry still rejects this ABOVE average, beautiful woman and instead objectifies the size 0, photoshopped, flawless model. Women are made to feel inferior for being normal. I say “piss off!” It’s time to accept yourself as you are. There is, however, a caveat to this. You must accept the fact that you cannot dress like the fashion model hoochie-mamas on the cover of magazines!!

SHORTS:
Ladies, unless your legs looks like this, please don’t attempt to wear short-shorts (don’t forget these legs have been photoshopped). Instead, choose a capri pant or a cool summer skirt. Please pass on those knee-level denim shorts; that style destroys any body. Play around with shorts, capris, skirts (different lengths), and jeans and be honest with yourself. My legs are my best asset and I have come to terms with the fact that skirts just above my knees, not shorts, show them off best. Find your best asset and figure out how to show it off. That’s how you rock your bod.

THE MUFFIN TOP:
Nothing screams I haven’t made peace with my body like the muffin top. You are telling the world that you have gained weight but refuse to admit it. Or, even worse, have no idea how to dress yourself. Never, ever, ever buy clothes that are too tight. Instead, opt for the next size and have the waist tailored to fit you. A good tailor is irreplaceable. Your clothes should always fit well. If you really love your body they can fit snugly, but never too tight. And never too baggy. Find a happy medium. And stretch pants? Don’t forget to check out your ass. If you can see your cellulite through your stretch pants then that is not a good fashion choice for you. Be honest with yourself; 98% of us have some sort of cellulite and not many of us can wear those stretch pants honestly. Ask the sales person to help you choose your new outfits. If you can’t afford to shop in a store with a sales person then go shop in one and don’t buy anything. It will help you get an idea of what looks good on you. Then head out to the store where you can afford to buy and buy your fashion-smart clothes. Now you’re on track.

Your clothes tell the world how you feel about yourself. It’s not about money; Walmart and Target have fantastic lines. It’s about putting it all together, throwing your shoulders back, and showing the world that you have arrived. Are you rockin’ it?

Still Rockin’ It
Scarlet Mom

Who has more fun? Blondes, Brunettes, or Red-heads??

By Scarlet Mom | September 28, 2010 | Being a Mom IS Sexy, Spicing Up Date Night, Style | Comments Off

I’m constantly amazed by the women I see in my daily life through work, in the airport, picking up the little guy from school. Some of these women look amazing and I think, “Wow. Good for you.” Others I think, “What are you thinking??” Or rather, is it that they are not thinking…or not looking? Why does it take a divorced woman to take notice of herself in the mirror? I remember when I got married my then mother-in-law gave me this gem of advice: “Now that you’re married you don’t have to worry about your appearance anymore.” Really??? My advice is the opposite. Now that you’re married you have to worry even more about your appearance. Now that you’re married you have to worry EVEN MORE about your appearance. This goes for both of you. You are now sleeping only with each other, spending gobs and gobs of time with each other, and spending endless naked time together. Make it enjoyable to stare endlessly at each other; to caress and explore each other’s bodies. When it’s time for date night, make your partner proud to be with you. Dress that hot, sexy body up and fix your hair (guys, too). And guys, you know you’re going to get some so break out that razor and play dress-up as well.

Speaking of hair, ladies, what have you done with yours lately? Did you know that your hair color changes over your lifetime due to hormones and diet? So the beautiful flowing locks that you had at 20 probably are not the same locks that you have at 40. Do you have gray showing through? If you have naturally dark hair a salt and pepper look probably looks good on you. But if you have anything lighter than “very dark” hair it only makes you look aged. The term “growing old gracefully” has changed to mean growing old with style and class. By not doing anything with your hair, cutting or coloring, you draw attention to negative aspects of yourself. By finding a great colorist and getting a fabulous cut, you can take years off your look in a matter of an hour or two. Have you ever seen Oprah do a show on makeovers and making people look ten years younger? The biggest change is coloring and cutting their hair. My stylist Leigh told me:

Anyone that has had lighter hair their whole life probably will just look aged if they choose to let their gray grow in. There are many services now to meet everyone’s gray coverage needs such as 100% opaque gray coverage or softly covered gray blending where up to 75% gray is covered. Store bought products really lie to you to sell products. If you put permanent hair color from root to end every time you are ruining the hair; it will cause the hair to over grab pigment or have extreme banding. LIKE OLD LADIES!

So which hair color has more fun? They all do…because they took the time to find a good colorist and a good stylist and are rockin’ their look. That’s the key. Read fashion magazines and work with your stylist to find something that suits you and works with your face and your hair. And hair color is fun. You can change it up, change it back, make it more intense, add highlights, have fun with it. Personally, I think red-heads have the most fun, but I’m biased. My favorite compliment from people is, “I love your hair color. Is it yours?” I always answer, “Damn straight it is. I paid for it.”

Still Rockin’ It
Scarlet Mom

(Leigh is located in Houston at Alan Murphy Salon. If you would like more information about her, please contact me.)

Manicures & Pedicures…and Their Etiquette

By Scarlet Mom | September 19, 2010 | Just For Fun, Style | 2 Comments

I believe that every woman, at some point in their life, should have a manicure and especially a pedicure. We all deserve to be pampered. There is something to be said for taking one hour out of your day, escaping from life, and having someone fawn over you. To have someone file and manicure your nails then paint them. To have them soak and scrub your feet until they are baby soft; and let’s not forget that massage that’s comes with all this. Ahhh…that massage. When you close your eyes and just drift off to your happy place while someone gently rubs and kneads your muscles, taking away all your tension, then life is so good. If you can completely shut out the rest of the world (and are completely exhausted like most moms) you can even drift off for a little nap. In my humble opinion, pedicures are a slice of heaven. I highly recommend them for anyone who has toes. Besides, for anyone trying to improve their appearance, find their inner goddess, this is a very simple way.

As for etiquette, it is a few simple rules that I think most of us already know. As for etiquette, it is a few simple rules that I think most of us already know. It really boils down to simple social skills. You can tell if your “neighbor” wants to chat with you, if you even want to chat. If not, please be gracious and shut the hell up. Nothing is more annoying than someone who can’t take a hint. There are a lot of people that love to chat and make new friends everywhere they go. My brother is one of those people and he has met some amazing people on airplanes and at college and made incredible contacts. But in discussing this issue with him we agreed that those personalities require acute social skills. On a long flight last month he, of course, chatted it up with the gentleman sitting next to him. BUT, they both were able to read the body language of each other and knew when the other was done talking and wanted to kick back, relax, and take a nap.

So as you hop out of those sweats and PJ’s and back on that style train, get out there and get your nails and especially your feet done. Nothing says sexy like soft, manicured feet. To keep them soft between pedicures try Kiehl’s Intensive Treatment and Moisturizer for Dry or Callused Areas (http://www.kiehls.com). Want something less expensive? Put Vaseline on your feet at night with a pair of socks; it works like a charm. But please, please remember…while getting that spa treatment: read the body language of your neighbor. More than likely, silence is golden.

Still Rockin’ It.
Scarlet Mom

What Do I Like More Than Being Naked??

By Scarlet Mom | September 10, 2010 | Style | 4 Comments

First and foremost, I like being naked. I have since I was a kid. I used to streak naked through the house all the time. Funny how some things never change. But I have noticed as some women age they seem to pile on more and more clothing (although a lot of it never matches). Sweats, ill-fitting T-shirts, and flip-flops seem to be the wardrobe for so many moms that I see at school, birthday parties or the grocery store. And don’t forget the slippers and rarely washed hair. Ladies! Just because you’re a mom now doesn’t mean you don’t have to bathe or dress yourself. And whatever you do…no flannel!!

So what do I like better than being naked? Well, nothing. But second to that I like being dressed like one hot mother phucker. Looking back on older photos of myself I realize that I didn’t always have such an acute fashion sense. In fact, it’s quite embarrassing. I think I’ll just blame it on the style of the decade. Whatever it was, I’ve learned a lot since.

First and foremost, when you leave the house remember that you never know whom you will run into. Odds are if you look like shit you will run into the one person you do not want to see. It’s a given. Moms don’t always have time to spend hours getting ready to a run to the grocery store, but a quick shower and basic, nice-looking and well-fitting clothes can turn you from a disaster into head-turning MILF.

The person who has taught me the most about basic fashion is Stacy London from TLC’s What Not To Wear. I love her directness and sense of humor. Her book Dress Your Best is a must have. The first thing she has you do is determine your body shape… your body shape NOW, not 10 pounds from now, but NOW. If you have goals that’s wonderful. I have blogged about weight loss and eating right and applaud you if that is your path right now. But great tailors exist in this world and they are there to be used. To determine your current body shape Stacy gives this advice in her book:

This is not rocket science. You don’t even need a tape measure. Just stand in front of a full-length mirror in your underwear, scary as that may sound, and take a look at yourself. (Stacy had Jack Daniels on the rocks and Clinton had a Tanqueray and tonic before attempting this exercise. Worked like a charm!)

Ah! A woman after my own heart. Of course, I had a Vodka first. She also gives some GREAT advice about those sweats:

Walking around in oversized sweats makes you look like you’ve given up. And you may start to internalize that feeling. So, this is one time in life when a quick fix can actually have long-term effects.

I really like this book because it takes pretty much each and every body type (men & women) and gives you work, weekend, and evening wardrobe essentials. I say “essentials” because it is all about quality over quantity. A few good pieces can mix and match very easily. And one of the best tips they give is how to pick out a pair of jeans; there really is an art involved in finding just the right jean for a woman. Be prepared to try on about 10-20 pair and take a friend, a true friend, who will be honest about how they look on you. Here’s their book:

One other item I recommend is the DVD set “What Not to Wear: Mom Makeovers.”

What Not To Wear is a great show all the way around for great makeover tips (clothes, hair, make-up); add it to your DVR lineup if you’ve never watched it. Stacy and her co-host Clinton give very direct advice without ever asking for someone to change their body. I like that.

Being sexy is about empowerment and having power over your own body; the body you have here and now. You have to own your sexuality, feel it, flaunt it, whore it out in the bedroom. What are you waiting for? The first head you turn will make your day.

Still Rockin’ It.
Scarlet Mom